Monday, 17 July 2017

And She's Back In The Game

Hello! Been a while hasn't it? I wrote my last blog post 2 & a half months ago, but for some reason it feels like so much longer. I'm not entirely sure what happened.
One minute I was inspired to the absolute max, then the next minute it was like my brain did a silent "fuck you" & took way all my inspiration & the enjoyment I usually have when I write. The more I thought about it the more annoyed I got & I just gave up on it.

A similar thing happened over on Instagram, happily posting twice a day, everyday & then I just felt like I was falling out of love with it all. I would usually love setting up for a shoot, taking pictures, faffing around with different props but this turned into something I didn't look forward to, something I just didn't want to do, so I took a step back to re-access the situation. I brand rep for quite a few companies & started to feel as though I was letting them down, maybe I should give it up. All these doubts running through my mind. Punishing myself for not being able to think of a picture to take, I felt like I was becoming consumed by it all & I just needed to stop.

As I took a step back, I relaxed. I didn't go on Instagram as much, I didn't post as regularly as I used to. I lost a few followers & lacked engagement but I didn't care. It's not what life is all about. For me, eventually blogging & photography is something I would love to make a living out of, so rather than posting when I'm not feeling it I only posted when I was. Only picking up my camera when I had an idea, it worked, & with each picture I started taking I realised that even in such a short space of time that my style was changing, growing from what it was before. But the best bit? I have fallen back in love with it all, not the likes & the followers- the creative side. Sharing what I adore doing, having ideas & creating pictures. Faffing around with flowers & flatlays whilst Seb destroys the house around me.

As my Instagram was changing I then figured the blog needed an update, so I went ahead & got a brand new template, which was oh so much fun to install... I don't remember the last one being such hard work to get right! I don't do things by halves you know!

The reason for this post, apart from the aesthetics is because I think it's dead important to not be bloody hard on yourself! When the inspiration leaves you, the motivation is a distant memory, when you think you will never get back to the thing you thought you were meant to do. STOP. When you get like this you just need to take a step back & relax. I was intent on beating myself up, telling myself I wasn't good enough which is just ridiculous! Sometimes for whatever reason "it" whatever "it" is just isn't there & you have to accept it & tell yourself it'll be back, & when it does come back you'll feel better than ever because it just confirms that those one or two bad weeks, even months won't stop you from achieving what you want in life. It's just a phase & you now what happens with every phase? It passes.

Love Gem


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